1:14pm
Impy: *pop* What the-*looks around*- OH!
Dean: *winks* How ya been stranger?
Impy: Fine, yourself?
Dean: Better now that-
Zed: *pop* Oh hell yes.
Xander: *wanders out from the trees* ...I wander away for a second and the masters show up.
Impy: *still eying Dean* Hey, Zed.
Zed: *smiling playfully at the men* Yeah?
Impy: Is Spencer Reid here?
Zed: He's around here somewhere.
Impy: *looks at Dean* Sorry, I must corrupt him....more then he's already been corrupted.
*wanders off to find Reid*
Sam: *to Dean* Dude, you just got ditched for a nerd.
Dean: Shut up....
Zed: Alright, now I know I haven't been here in a while so you all should just form a line in front of my hut. *evil grin*
Zed: 1:29
Zed: Looks around at the surrounding hotness* It's good to be back!
Tessy: We've missed you my queen.
Zed: Yeah, that's still not enough to get you laid.
Tessy: Well then... Fuck you. *walks off*
Zed: *giggles* I like PMS'ing geniuses...
Bigfoot: You shouldn't tease him the way you do. May snap.
Zed: DILLIGAF! Sparrow-- NO.
Sparrow: Hmph. *takes a swig of rum and walks off* My dilly-gaff.
Zed: Before I get started I need to bring in a few men who were somehow skipped over when we were creating this place: First Dr. Peter Grodin.
*pop*
Rodney: You can't be here. Peter Grodin is dead.
Zed: Dude, Rodney. *points at self* God, remember?
Rodney: B-b-but... PHYSICS!
Sparrow: Dilly-gaff?
Zed: Thank you, Jack. Now, where was I? Oh yes, up next is Major Kevin Marks.
*pop*
O'Neill: *peering over Zed's shoulder* His first name is Kevin?
Marks: Yes, sir.
Zed: ... You've known him, what? Five years now? How don't you know that?
O'Neill: I didn't think he'd last a week and after that point I knew him too well to ask.
Zed: I can't even... OK Anyway, now onto the fun part! Marks, make this woman go away. *wink*
Marks: *raises one eyebrow* Should I blow you up too?
Zed: No I do the blowing, not you. Now, move.
Marks: *carries Zed off to the Hut*
Impy : 1:49
Impy: *wandering out of the trees looking like a total mess* Where is he?! If I had these magic Godlike powers I could find him.
Men: *back away from frustrated Impy*
Sparrow: Perhaps, my lady darling...misses, if you were to look were you haven't thought yet to look, you would find the thing that is missing that you are looking for that you haven't yet found.
Impy:...Thanks.
Faramir: Mi'lady, I will gladly service you in Master Reid's stead.
Impy: Oh, alright.
Faramir: *carries Impy off to the Hut*
Zed: 1:57
Zed: Why didn't she just take Jack's compass to find what she wanted?
Sparrow: Because I sold it.
Zed: To who and for what?
Sparrow: Tesla and rum.
Zed: Nikola has the compass?
Sparrow: Aye.
Zed: *face!palm* We're gonna die.
Sheppard: Why?
Zed: What does Tessy want more than anything else right now?
Everyone: Sex.
Zed: Exactly.
Shep: *still doesn't get it*
Zed: *rolls eye at his naiveté* he compass will lead him to what he wants- sex- Therefore it will lead him to the nearest body he can get sex from.
Shep: OH my god...
Zed: There we go. We need to find Tessy before he finds Rock. EVERYBODY SADDLE UP!
*Everyone is suddenly on a saddled horse*
Zed: Move out!
Inpy: 2:17
Impy: *walks out of hut* Where did everybody go? *looks upward for no particular reason*
Faramir: *stumbles out of hut* I did not know I could feel pain in that region.
Impy: Sorry, I'm double jointed sooooo...*keeps staring upward at trees* Wait a second....He's in the trees! *runs into forest*
Zed: 2:29
Zed: *riding along the path* Where the hell is she?
Sheppard: Wouldn't she normally be in the hut when her mind isn't here?
Zed: I checked there. And last time I was here I left first so I have no idea where she went.
O'Neill: Did you check the cotton candy clouds?
Zed: Yes I did, I'm not an idiot.
Jayne: What about the pond? Y'know the one you guys made so we could breathe underwater?
Zed: Only a crazy person wouldn't check there.
Jayne: *under his breath* I'm pretty sure only a crazy person would check there...
Lorne: *over radio* Um we found something... interesting... you should probably take a look at.
Zed: *snaps her fingers and appears next to Lorne's team* Huh... He's um... What is he doing?
Lorne: He's trying to take over the Island again, this is how he did it last time. He wanted power not sex.
Ten: Madman...
Zed: Wait, back up, THIS is how he took over last time? ... With a chocolate bunny army?!
Lorne: *nods*
Zed: And you LOST against him.
*Lorne nods again*
Zed: *blank stare*
Lorne: They're tougher than they look....
Impy: 2:39
Impy: Ow...note to self; I'm to clumsy to climb trees.
*sees random ferns moving...out hops a bunny*
Impy: Oh...CCCUUUTTTEEEE.
Bunny: *moves awkwardly towards her*
Impy: Wait...you're not...how are you moving?
Bunny: *starts moving faster, baring tiny chocolate teeth*
Impy: O_O *runs*
Zed: 2:48
Zed: *hears a scream from beach* Well... Crap.
*everyone runs back towards the huts*
Zed: Why am I running? *snaps fingers and appears on the beach*
Impy: HELP ME!
Zed: *turns around to see Impy tied to a tree by the chocolate bunnies who are now chewing on her shoes* THEY'RE SIX INCHES TALL! Just step on them for fuck's sake. *begins walking to where Impy is tied up* *kicks several bunnies out of the way*
Impy: You don't want to do that...
Zed: Sure I don't... *begins cutting at the ropes*
MMRRRROWOWEIERRRRR
Zed: *turns towards the noise* *sees choco!bunny foaming at the mouth and growling at her* What do you think you're gonna do? Gnaw on my toe?
Choco!Bunny: *bares all of its very large teeth*
Zed: ... Frak. *begins running and screaming at the top of her lungs*
Men: *are still trying to get through the jungle on horseback*
Aragorn: Our masters are in danger! *is the first person to realize they can now dismount their horse* *runs towards the beach* FFOOOORRRR FRODOOOO!!!!!
*everyone else runs after him*
Impy: 3:13
Impy: *is still screaming for dear life as the chocolate bunnies start biting her ankles*
Men: *charge onto the beach, each with they're own weapon leaving destroyed chocolate bunnies in they're wake*
Zed: *screaming stumbles onto the beach*
Impy: Men stop! Stop! The more you kill the larger they'll be when they reform.
Hatter: I really don't see-
Impy: How the hell do you think I got tied up? *continues to kick at the bunnies*
*as if on cue a large bunny steps out from behind the tree*
Dean: Son of a Bitch!
Zed: 3:26
Zed: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!
*loud booming voice*
WHO DARES DISTURB THIS ISLAND'S PEACE?
Zed: Tesla did it. Save us, oh mysterious voice!
IT SHALL BE DONE.
*loud clap of thunder*
Choco!Bunnies: *begin to disappear one by one*
Zed: Thank you, cloud man.
I AM NO MAN.
*a heavenly light floats down to the Island and takes the form of a human*
Zed: Rocky? What the hell?
I SAW IN TESLA'S MIND HIS--
Zed: Hold on a sec, can you, um, can you stop that? It's giving me a headache.
Rock: As you wish. I saw in Tesla's mind his plan. So I took form in the heavens to protect our solace.
Zed: ... ... ... What the fuck.
Rock: SHUT UP! I'M BEING A GOD!
Zed: 0.0 Ohhhhkaaaayyy.
Rock: I have removed the evil thoughts from the one called Tesla's mind. He shall henceforth be as docile as a rabbit.
Zed: I really hope you don't mean his little chocolate rabbits.
Rock: I shall take my leave. Enjoy your peace, I shall return when you need me most... Unless I get really horny... I'd probably return at that point too... Farewell.
Zed: OK, for real? What the hell?!
Impy: 3:30
Impy: o.O
Hatter: You ok?
Impy: Does stuff like this happen often?
Zed:...Sometimes.
Impy: I think I need hut time.
Hatter: *picks her up and carries her to the hut*
Zed: Oooook now that that's over with....Where is Tesla?
Zed: 3:38
Tessy: *shouting from the woods, at the top of a tree* HELLO? Can anyone hear me?
Lorne: Yes, we can. What the hell do you want?
Tessy: *whimpers* Help me.
Lorne: Help you what?
Tesla: Down. Scared of heights. *clings to tree for dear life*
Lorne: You gotta be kidding me.
Tessy: I assure you I'm not. And if you help me I promise to never attempt to control the Island ever, ever again.
Zed: You can't anyway, the evil is gone.
Tessy: *wry smile* It's never all gone, baby.
Zed: *blank stare*
Tessy: OH JUST GET ME DOWN!
Zed: *sigh* Fine. *snaps fingers and Tesla appears next to her on the ground* Happy?
Tessy: Exceedingly. Now, since I'm not evil anymore.... Hut? Please?
Zed: *big grin* No. The evil's never all gone. Baby. *evil grin*
Tessy: Son. Of. A. Bitch.
Zed: *walking away with the others* Lorne, you made an excellent team leader today, you deserve some hut!time. *jumps in his arms* Away with me. ;P
Lorne: Yes, ma'am!
Impy: 3:47
Impy: *walks out of hut* ALRIGHT! MEN FALL IN LINE
Men: *line up*
Impy: Now, I saw some great work today with the bunnies.
Mal: Thank you ma'am.
Impy: You're welcome. As I was saying, great work. By this time I'm sure you all know that I am looking for Spencer Reid.
Sparrow: ...Dillygaf?
Impy: shh....I'm also sure you all know that my powers are not as extensive as Zed's and Rocky's. So, I need your help.
Alec: And why exactly are we helping you?
Impy: I give you double jointed sex, that's reason enough.
Dean Touche.
Impy: Ok, now someone get the horses and you'll help me look because I have no idea where anything is....
Zed: 3:55
Zed: *watches them walk off* Tsk tsk. Don't you know anything?
Impy: About this place? No.
Zed: *snaps fingers* *Reid walks out of the woods* Mind control is a wonderful thing.
Reid: *to Zed* You called?
Zed: Yes. Stop running off. You're frustrating Impy.
Reid: My apologies, my liege.
Zed: Yeah, that's creepy. *snaps fingers to remove mind control*
Reid: *snaps out of it* *to Impy* Uh... Helloooo.
Impy: *swoons*
Zed: Go have some fun kiddos!
*Reid leads Impy to th hut*
Zed: You gonna call the men back to the beach?
Impy: How do you words?
Zed: Right... Well I'm not either. Hope they like camping.
Lorne: That's incredibly evil... And hot.
Zed: *big grin* Good boy. Now time for round two! *kicks the door shut behind her*
